Quarantine Diary - A Simple Favor

Saturday, 18 April 2020 

I don't know what should I post today, I had a swing mood and it's the weekend tbh :) 

I just want to thank you for everything you've done for me. remembered the 1st time I met you in April 2014, a Man with a dark blue suit with magic works that sparked my life " Never give up". 

Long story short, I've been living alone since Junior high (12 years old), my Parent was out of town. I knew they wanted me to grow up better that's why he put me in Boarding School. I never told any challenges I faced in life. I was too shy and embarrassed to share, and I didn't want them to feel sad. I kept my hard days alone. It's hard when know one day my mom passed away and we had only a little time together, I remember the day when my mom attended my graduation. She was very much happy while pretending to be a healthy person. She never showed her illness in front of us even though she has took medicine for almost 13 years, I know it's hard and I was sorry to her. 


There was a day when crying became my day-to-day lifestyle. I lost my hand in 2014 when My ex-boyfriend walked away and my warmest hand ‘mom’ passed away. My breath almost went away following where my mom went. I lost my steps and directions. Time almost killing me every minute. Every song became a sad song and every day became misery for me. But, there was a day also when learning became my new thing. When I finally find my breath, find the purpose of life, find love. I know that your hand holds me tight to see real life, not a fairy style. I cannot imagine who I would become if I met the wrong person in that situation, I cannot differentiate what is good and what is bad for me. 

It’s hard for me to live until you find me. I was just a little girl that needed someone to teach me what is life. I did many wrongdoings on the way during the healing process. I thank you for taking good care of me and helping me find my life back. 

There are small things that maybe you don’t even recognize and they shaped me into how I am become now. The important thing I still remember and practice every time, is the magical words that you inserted into my mind: ‘Never expect anybody to love me’ and ‘brave to say NO”. These simple words however have had a big impact on my daily basis and professional life. Still, I need to develop several soft and hard skills but I recognize that I am improving. 

I thank every second I spent with you. I thank you every morning and night we talked and shared, I thank you every time we sang songs.

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